Falkner House (Best before Year 7)

Take some ambition, kindled in 1954,

and add it to the pot.

Blend in discipline and stir vigorously.

Chop a block of values into three:

kindness, resilience and respect,

and sprinkle a bit on every pupil.

Add pupils and bring to the boil.

As the mixture bubbles,

put a sprig of culture,

a sprinkle of religion

and a sample of learning

into a bowl and beat together.

Pour into the pot.

Turn off the heat and give time to cool.

As soon as the mixture is cool,

garnish it with fun and happiness

and enjoy.

Note: Please respect all the pupils’ individuality, or some pupils will become mouldy.

Warning: Too little discipline will create a chaotic taste, whereas too much will result in a boring one.

This poem was written by a Year Six pupil in September 2025, in the style of Benjamin Zephaniah’s “The British.”